There are times when I feel like I am beating my head against a rock. I keep struggling with the same issue, the same problem over and over again. I ask myself why it is still a regular obstacle, but I can never get an answer. I’ll pray about it, and God seems to be silent on the matter.
It doesn’t matter what the particular issue is, we all have that one thing that we continually come up against and fumble. Time and again, we fall, we succumb to the pressure. And then, time and again, we wonder where we have gone wrong, and how can we possibly fix.
But our falling down, our stumbling, our being broken may be a great thing. It’s time like that when God has the opportunity to do something in our lives that may not happen any other way. In her new book, Almost There, Beka DiFelice talks about how God uses those moments when we fail and fall for a miraculous purpose.
“I wonder, too, if God doesn’t use this sort of transience to draw us to himself, if he doesn’t occasionally wring out the things we don’t want to give him to expose all the ways we don’t trust him. Out comes insecurity, fear, and doubt, the lies we’ve believed about ourselves and about him. Out comes the mindless religion—the empty habits and vague affections. All the feeble hooks we’ve hung our worth on, every striving part of us tumbles out until we are emptied of our own merit, of all pretenses, laid bare exactly as we are, perhaps facedown in the literal sense, with crutches and an enormous ice pack standing by. It’s here, stripped down to the beams, that we figure out who we are and what we truly believe. We get to the authentic relationship, to the honest posture of the heart, to faith that’s birthed from a willingness to love God not from a place of control but from a place of surrender.”
Maybe the reason I keep struggling with the same issues over and over is that I keep getting up and refusing to let God do His work. Maybe the problem is that while God is preparing to do heart surgery on me, I am trying to sow myself back up. Maybe my problem really is, not just the reocccurring issue, but I am scared to let God actually grab a hold of me and change who I am.
I know I’m not alone in that fear, but that fear is misplaced. There is no reason to scared of the One Who Loves Us, the one who looks at us and calls us “Beloved”. When we fall, when we stumble, we can rest assured that we are in the gentle hands of the Father, one who lovingly hides us under His wing, one who moulds us to reflect His glory.
It may be frustrating. It may be annoying. Falling in the same place, finding yourself facing the same issue over and over can drive you mad. But take heart. It is in this place that God can do something marvellous, if you will let Him.
Allow the Father to work in your heart, be shaped by His Spirit, and changed by the eternal love of Jesus Christ.
Almost There by Bekah DiFelice comes out July 2017. Make sure you pick up a copy wherever Tyndale books are sold.